Last Shall Be First

Amy and her parents, Jimmie Lou and Lou

Amy’s mother, Jimmie Lou, has Alzheimer’s disease. It’s sad watching a once vigorous woman slowly lose her mental capabilities. Jimmie Lou tells others that Amy is her sister even though Jimmie Lou doesn’t have a sister; she says she’s known perfect strangers “since they were little children;” and in past phone conversations has identified her husband of 53 years as “the man in the kitchen.”

Amy’s dad, Lou (yes, Amy’s parents are Lou and Jimmie Lou), is destined for the Caregiver’s Hall of Fame. If there is a Patron Saint of Caregivers, he or she will someday be dethroned by “Saint Lou.” Lou singlehandedly does everything for Jimmie Lou. He bathes her, dresses her, makes sure she takes her medicines on time (he carries a kitchen timer in his shirt pocket), makes sure “Bonanza” or “Gunsmoke” is on the TV, and that Jimmie Lou gets to her doctor’s appointments on time. He also keeps their house clean, does the laundry, researches new treatments and medications for Alzheimer’s and handles all of their finances.

As tragic as Jimmie Lou’s condition is, she has a child-like innocence that is both sweet and adorable.

Lou and Jimmie Lou live in a suburb of Las Vegas. Every day, Lou takes Jimmie Lou to a different casino buffet for dinner. On the last day of our recent visit, Lou, Jimmie Lou, Amy and I went to The Orleans. While getting her “appetizer” plate of shrimp cocktail, salad, beets and fruit, Lou noticed the dessert bar had only one slice of Jimmie Lou’s favorite pecan pie. Fearing the buffet didn’t have a replacement should someone else pick up the dessert, Lou got the plate with the pecan pie well before dessert time.

“This is for dessert,” Lou told a wide-eyed Jimmie Lou as he placed the plate at the center of the round table.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly as her excitement faded.

But like a rare, brilliant gem, Jimmie Lou couldn’t keep her eyes off the pecan pie. Thirty seconds to a minute later, Jimmie Lou reached over, pulled the plate with the pecan pie toward her and took a bite.

“That is for dessert,” Lou reminded her.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly.

Thirty seconds to a minute later, Jimmie Lou reached over, pulled the plate with the pecan pie toward her and took another bite.

“That is for dessert,” Lou reminded her emphatically.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly.

When he was ready, Lou left the table to get his and Jimmie Lou’s “entrée” plate. As soon as he was out of earshot, Jimmie Lou reached over, pulled the plate with the pecan pie toward her and took four bites before Lou returned.

“That is for dessert!” Lou reminded her more emphatically than before.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly.

Thirty seconds to a minute later, the waitress asked if Jimmie Lou was done with her “appetizer” plate.

“Yes,” Jimmie Lou said, “and you can take this one (the ‘entrée’ plate), too” as she reached for the plate with the pecan pie.

“No! She hasn’t touched that yet!” Lou told the waitress. “That (the pie) is for dessert!” Lou reminded Jimmie Lou.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly.

Thirty seconds to a minute later, Jimmie Lou reached over, pulled the plate with the pecan pie toward her and took the last remaining bite. Lou just sighed.

Thirty seconds to a minute later, Jimmie Lou asked Lou, “Are you going to get dessert?”

“The pie you just ate was dessert,” Lou answered.

“Oh,” Jimmie Lou said forlornly.